Our God

There is something very beautiful and tragic about saying,

"Our God is an awesome God
He reigns from heaven above
With wisdom, power and love"


We sang that around my Dad's bedside after his heart stopped. What a sad group of singers we were. Maybe Karmen's fragile voice started first and we all joined in as we could, reluctantly and then with determination. After praying about his recovery finally became unnecessary.

Sometimes "he reigns with wisdom, power and love" is a deeply beautiful and deeply comforting yet ultimately very difficult thing to know and to sing.

Speaking of Beautiful People

Speaking of beautiful people, not that we were...

I am crazy about Kate Winslet. I absolutely love her style and how womanly she is.

There is something world-weary and knowing in her eyes, perhaps that's what I like about her. She's no dizzy dame.

Jihad & Crusade, A Story About Two Brothers (JK JK)

Currently writing an essay about the Islamic-Christian attitudes toward one another during the early Crusades, specifically how their wrong beliefs about the opposition's faith and values might or might not have been the straw that broke the camel's back. In Western Christianity you've got this growing warrior class of nobles constrained by scarce land and money, fighting each other over and over again, but mostly chasing tails. In Eastern Islam you've got the people who kept Greek thought alive while the West lost all literacy and intelligence, and a people group who were the trading center of the whole Old World, wanting to expand their trade and develop their wealth and influence to the people of the West who spent their time chasing tails.

The original texts written by Muslims and Christians of that era are surprising. The Christians actually seem pretty superstitious and backwards and they do weird things in the name of God like having a boat load of prostitutes shipped to the Holy Land to provide the crusaders with necessary services of all sorts. You also hear these stories about women dressing themselves up like men to fight and older women acting like busybodies around town. Very weird. The Muslims seem snooty but are admittedly much more sophisticated in science, math and medicine because they didn't go through the same "Dark Age" period where learning was snuffed out, so they've got this attitude toward the Westerners that is like a teenager smirking at his five year old brother for wearing a towel around his neck and calling himself a warrior. The crusaders come off as zealous and ardent in a way that makes a modern Christian cringe, whereas the jihadists are lucky enough to come off as rational but simply repulsed by the crusaders.

Any number of theses could work for this essay, but of course, I'm looking for the perfect golden scarab hiding under an amethyst rock. I think that the fact that these original eyewitness accounts of the crusades are so surprising to me is a great start. Curiosity is always a better fuel than boredom for these sorts of things.

Lean on Me

Getting sick.

Taking two really big tests today.

God has given us everything we need for life and godliness.

I'm leaning on Him today.

The Best Things

Some things are too good to be true.


Some things are so true that they cannot be anything else.

Sometimes the best thing you can do for yourself is be repentent.

And... honest.
And... hopeful.

(A little excitement doesn't hurt, either)

But in the end? The best things in life can't be earned or stolen. They can only be given and received.

Converting the Soul

Whatever things might change as time goes by, my day is still my own right now.

I'm sitting on an old stucco-like wall that has been painted over again and again. My shoes are off, kicked onto the cement below where I'm perched. My jeans are rolled up to my knees and I've lathered my feet with hand lotion that I keep in my backpack. I've got three shirts on to keep me warm, even though the sun is out in full force right now. I'm facing the sun directly and my hair is pulled back into a ponytail.

I ate my lunch like this and random bumble bees and flying insects came and went like friendly visitors to my lunchtime reverie. The grass is still green and soft, and still feels wonderful on warm days like this when I have a two hour lunch break to while away in whatever manner pleases me.

I like to think that every day should have moments like this, where the connection between heaven and earth is tangible. I read yesterday a verse that said something like the testimony of the Lord is good and converts the soul. Today feels like the embodiment of that idea. The goodness of God is more obvious to me when I'm this relaxed and at peace. It converts the wayward places in my soul.

As Dixon often says: Pray, God is near.

Short And Sweet

Life is full of surprises.


I am happy.